Well, just hours away from Christmas. Each Christmas Eve, especially since my family trundles off to their other family's Christmas Eves, I long for the Forcier/Chretien Christmas Eves of my childhood. Those were the real thing, full of family, love, and just Christmasness. Ok, Christmasness isn't a word, but that is how I feel about those Christmas Eves.
I do not and will not begrudge my family spending time with their newly formed families. I do begrudge that since these families have come together I have never had a Christmas Eve or Christmas with my family, not one. I don't even get Thanksgiving. Now I am far away and I even have a hard time getting one grandchild for a week. The grandchild I raised for nearly two years. Yes I resent it, but what do I do about it?
Christmas has always a magical time for me, yes even now. There is something magic about it and for me there always will be, even if I spend it alone with my dog. This Christmas, Emma and I will go on our long walk, hopefully at the dam. I have no idea if the trails will be open or not, if not we'll walk somewhere else. Things always seem to work out on Christmas, don't they? There is always one thing or other that works out after not working out all year long. At least it seems that way for me. Maybe it is just me stressing out over something for a year and then finally working it out. I prefer the magic part.
I am not a Coke drinker, but man they find the best artists to create their Santas, this one is from 1951. I didn't put up my Santa ornaments this year, primarily because I didn't get a tree. If I would had family over, a tree I would have, but that didn't happen. It will always likely be my job to get to their homes on Christmas. I know I live a long ways away, but no one has come to visit me and that sort of hurts. But enough of the pity me party. Because I am very happy here being far away isn't as bad as it could be and for that I am grateful. Hermiston is a nice place to live, wish I lived in a house, but the apartment is ok for now.
Another Coke rendition of Santa. I love Santas, just realized that I didn't buy my annual Santa ornament, dang it! Even if I didn't have a tree, of course, no Hallmark here in Hermiston and I totally spaced it when I went to the mall in Tri Cities. Oh well, there's always next year.