What if I had all the money I ever wanted? That is such a crazy thing to say, don't you think? I want a good job that pays me a good salary and I want more than anything to pay off all off all of my bills. To be debt free that is what I want.
At this point in my life, I'm not so sure I want to be a teacher anymore. I so love working with students, but I am not sure that teaching is the best way for me to advocate for students. But nonprofits aren't hiring and I don't have any experience doing anything other than teaching, so I'm not sure what I can do to make money. I can't stand being on unemployment, I did the whole on the public dole thing back when I was first divorced and I don't like it.
Speaking of being divorced, my ex will be in town tomorrow for his mother's memorial. It is so weird neither of them have lived in Salem for over 10 years so the whole memorial here in Salem is sorta weird on one level. I don't think they even have family here, oh almost forgot she's a crum, female member of the Masons, I have no idea what the female organization is called. Anyway, my son said he told his dad they could go to a bar and have a beer, but that he didn't want him at his house. Well, he didn't tell him that last part, that's what he told me after I said I was so over his dad. To keep a grudge that long, wait his sister still has one, she has it bad. But then she was only 1 when we divorced so no love lost there.
Home alone for a bit as Kelsey, Matt and the girls are going to spend time with his parents for a little bit. Which is annoying since I need help with the electric and phone bills and she didn't leave any money with me to help me out. It is starting to get really really annoying, more than that I am angry and what can I do? I won't kick them out, but shit my electric bill is twice what it would be if I was here alone, actually probably three times as much. They do tons of laundry, which brings up the other point that she used the last of it and didn't buy any more so now I have to do it.
She does help out with the food and that is one thing I don't have to worry about.
Didn't go to Andrew's second to last music program tonight. I feel really bad, but it is so hard just to get out of the house when I feel so angry about Kelsey and so depressed about not having money. Oh and top it all off Matt comes in says he's taking Sabby, their dog, and promptly takes the only dog shampoo in the house, that I bought, then gets some dogfood, which I also bought, I am really not doing well today. I shall stop writing now before I decide to go shoot myself in the fucking head.